Tell me true

Tell me where the blame lies in this case, dear internet. I know, but I'd love an impartial opinion.

A package arrived from Amazon a couple days ago, addressed to my husband. While I'm not usually in the habit of opening packages addressed to him, considering I'd used his Amazon profile to order presents for the kids I thought, "Now, maybe this is something I forgot I ordered." Because forgetting is one thing I do really, really well. Plus, he was there when I brought it in from the porch, and he didn't grab it and say, "Oh, that must be my Confubulation Filter I ordered for my fish tank. The one that will keep it from exploding all over the family room floor."

I'd have been none the wiser if he'd said something like this. I don't speak fish, much less tank. He could have said, "This is the Greco-Roman Mud Wrestling apparatus" and I wouldn't have blinked an eye. Well, maybe one eye, but the long and the short of it is I wouldn't have opened the package.

So, yesterday I was wrapping presents. I got through everything I had, then looked at the Amazon box on the counter. Maybe it was a gadget for the kids. Maybe. So I opened it. Lo and behold, it was part of the list of books I'd given Paul, to help make shopping easier. Because we usually wind up giving each other things we hate, especially since none of the things he gives me at the holidays are ever sparkly and set in platinum or gold settings. And none of the things I give him have gills and breathe.

Naturally, I wrapped the box. It was mine, after all. And Paul wraps like crap.




So, this morning he was all, "What happened to that Amazon box that was sitting on the counter?" Without looking away from the Boggle app I was playing on my iPhone, the one that has replaced eating, sleeping and showering in my life, I called out, "Oh, I wrapped it."

"You WHAT?!" was his reply.

I went on to explain what happened, and how I'd wrapped the sucker and stuck it beneath the tree.

Reader, he was beside himself.

The joke is we knew what we were gifting each other for Christmas. Or, we knew what we'd asked for (otherwise we'd both wind up pouting over Christmas breakfast because we didn't want a toaster, a new tie, or a set of bath towels). He sent me the freaking link for the set of books he wanted. Plus the coupon that expired in two days. So, duh. I retaliated by sending him a list of books from Amazon. It wasn't a particularly long list, so, again, duh.

Was what I did SO wrong? Really?



One thought on “Tell me true

  1. Just discovered your blog. Love it. You’ve been making me laugh for the last few minutes and now I’ve discovered we have the same cat. Diesel has a slightly darker nose, which I’m sure she lightens when she dashes over to your Christmas tree to pose.


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