You cannot make this stuff up. Crikey, I should look at this way more than I do. I keep wasting all my time on things like homework, eating, sleeping, breathing and watching reality TV, when all the good stuff has apparently been going on here.

Here are a few more of the weird searches that have led people to Bluestalking:

Madison torridsex comes

I think I'd remember this. Trust me. I know Madison has a bar that features complimentary bacon, which would be damn close, but I've never been there.

 

wendys wild weekend

 

Wendy! Dude! Are you sending pictures?

 

"Vic Shaw" Chicago brothels

Try the Yellow Pages, Vic.

 

lust book

 

Now you're speaking my language! Wait … Are we talking lusting about books, or books about lusting? Ah, who am I kidding. Either's good.

 

but i'd give it all away just

 

In a heartbeat. But no one would take it.

 

panties are happiness sissy

 

Okay, this panty thing is weirding me out. In the last edition we had a reference to "my mother's panties," something so foul I feel the need to scrub myself raw with a wire brush just reading it. GET OVER THE PANTIES, WEIRDO!

 

And who you calling a sissy?

 

term papers suck

 

So, you've been reading my homework. Is nothing sacred?

 

signs of love from a man

 

When he hands you the remote, you can start picking out a wedding dress.

 

how to whatever i wanna sell

 

See eBay. After you see an English teacher.

 

Cannot do homework

 

Are you looking for excuses? 'Cause I have a ton of them! Try: "My (insert relative here) needs me to donate my (insert organ name), so I'll be out for a week or two. Or twelve."

 

If you've used that so often you've run out of organs, try: "I'm going to Malawi with Madonna to help her pick out her next child." Believe me, you'll never run out of those.

 

vengeance is walking salem

I was there in 2007. You can rest easy now.

librarian will dye her hair for books read

 

No. No she won't.

 

christopher marlowe hunchback

 

I got nothin'.

 

i could not sleep i kept thinking about something

 

Well?! Are you going to keep us in suspense?! WHAT? WHAT?

 

 

Stay tuned for the next edition, coming at a random, unknown time in the future, once I've accumulated a few more. Let's just hope there are no panties.